I didn’t write yesterday. I had a 9-day streak that I hadn’t rivaled since last November. I am happy with the progress I have made lately, so I forgave myself when I didn’t have the energy to sit down here and get some words on the page.
I can
honestly say the biggest reason I have been able to get “arse in chair, words
on page” in the last nine days was because Ed was cooking dinner. He prepared a
new home-cooked meal every night for eight days straight. No takeout, no repeaters,
no sandwiches. It was real food, and there was a variety: chicken, steak, fish, pasta. We had it all!
He was proud to say that he used all the major appliances, as well: oven, stove, microwave, air fryer, Insta-Pot,
and slow cooker. The man was on a roll!
This run as head chef has never happened in our twenty-five plus years
together.
Everyone
knows I hate cooking. I have not kept it a secret, faked it or denied it. For years
I longed for Ed to find the time to take the lead in the kitchen and prepare
the evening meals. He is, after all, a lot better at it than I am. He is more
creative in the kitchen, as well as more daring. He is willing to try new
things and if it doesn’t come out the way he hoped, then he orders take-out and
commits to making appropriate changes for the next attempt. We approach cooking
in two completely different ways. I address it the same way that a Black Ops
team approaches an extraction: move in,
clean sweep, accomplish the objective and get out. Ed arrives in the kitchen with
the spirit of Jula Child on his shoulder and the bravissimo of Emeril in
everything he touches. “Bam!” Yes, he just did that.
Not having
to cook gave me HOURS back into my day. Even on the nights I cleaned up after
dinner, I was still able to get more done than I have achieved in the last six
months of evenings. Jake jumped in on Monday and prepared the entire meal for
the family and I had yet another night of personal accomplishments. Not having
to prepare dinner is the heftiest task off my To Do List, and it rarely
actually makes its way onto the list because it’s usually just a given. For the
last nine days I had mental clarity, focus for me, and an opportunity to feel
less burdened by what I needed to provide for other people. That doesn’t mean that I didn’t take care of
my family. Instead, I managed to clean the entire house, order groceries, and
continue to take Miranda to work and pick her back up. Jax and I got our outside
time, I got my work done for Matt and I got my writing done. The mental
anguish of what to prepare each night is enough time out of my day that
it interferes with the rest of the housework I must finish. Cooking dinner on a
nightly basis really has been the bane of my existence.
In the
last few years, I have stopped beating myself up for not liking to cook, and
for not being able to do it seven nights a week. I was much better when the
kids were little, but as they got older and everyone’s schedules shifted away
from the family unit because of sports and jobs, I found satisfaction and a sense
of accomplishment in cooking four nights a week. One night was leftovers, one
night was take out, and one night was “You’re on your own. Figure it out for
yourselves.” It wasn’t a perfect system, but it worked for me. I hoped it worked
for my family.
So, I didn’t
write last night. Why? Because I cooked dinner and I cleaned up the kitchen afterwards
by myself, like I’ve done most nights of the last two decades. This was after
doing the housework and work for Matt. After picking Miranda up from work. It’s
that simple. I cannot do it all. Something’s always gotta give.
That is
why it is 10:15AM and I am sitting here to get the thoughts in my head out now.
It’s about priorities. I wish that Ed would cook dinner for the rest of our
lives, but I am not sure that he has that long of a run in him. I am delirious
with appreciation over the last nine days! I will keep my fingers crossed and
hope for more. But in case the duty does fall primarily back to me, I will have
already gotten my writing in for the day. It just means that maybe the dusting
doesn’t get done today.
No comments:
Post a Comment